Beautiful
A sweet word from underneath the ocean. Longing, love and the desperate need to empty one’s heart, to achieve freedom. Dried up tears, which strike against the face and shed their own sorrow.
I am crushed – but not willing to collapse! something inside of me is shouting.
Is it perhaps my stubborn Finnish heritage. Let my soul cry out in agony as long as it desires, but I will not give up.
Rebellion tires me, and I am sinking into the boring mode of surrender. May the others shout out and survive, I can no longer. Why should I be better than someone else?
No! shouts a persistent voice even louder somewhere deep inside. Alright, I give in. I must try again.
I breathe in oxygen for my lungs and I notice myself floating on a warm ocean surface. The little waves stroke my cheeks and compensate the loss of oxygen from the depths.
How easy it is for everyone else, but poor me, I simply face trials without an end.
Just a few more strokes to the shore. Dragging my tired body after a long dive, I reach the border between earth and water. What if I remain here and let myself erode amongst the other dead plants.
I sigh and know I have already lost the fight. I still would not give up nor be neglectful. I simply am not. I am beautiful, despite my anger and exhaustion.
I am beautiful because I have received life. I am beautiful because you made me. I am beautiful because you are. I exist because of you. That is the essence of it all. From your depths springs forth life. You are life and I am your daughter. Beautiful and relentless.